I recently broke a bolt off in the end of my crank shaft, here's a related story
First, a little background. Before I started my own company, I worked for another company as the services manager. Basically what I did was manage all the relationships/contacts we had with all of the stores, vendors, dealers, hiring new eployees, some training, etc. The company was growing fast, and I was a very busy person. Anyways, it was late thursday night, and my boss and several office ladies (I shall refer to them as the "dispatch bitches", they come into play in another story)and I were sitting around bs'ing after work, and my boss asked me if I was willing to do some travelling. "Sure, where do you want me to go?" I asked. "Colorado" he replied. We talked about it for a few minutes, and it sounded like a great opportunity, plus he offered me a increase in pay plus covering my expenses while I was gone. I nearly shit my pants with excitement as I asked "When do I leave?" Well, my boss was not one for planning things out really well, and he told me I needed to leave Saturday morning. And I had to drive. From Detroit. To Colorado. And I had to buy a new truck to drive out there in. And pack. And make arrangements for someone to watch my house, take care of my pets, make sure my bills were paid, etc.
I was pissed, but I managed to get everything taken care of, albeit a little late. I left at about 8 pm Saturday night. I had a meeting at 9am in Colorado Springs monday morning, I had ALOT of driving to do and little time to do it in. To pass the time I decided to text and call everyone I knew, to help keep me awake and from getting bored.
About 2am, I get a phone call from our beloved Andy, who seemed VERY distressed. I don't know if you remember the "How to break up a happy couple?" thread, but Andy is half of that "happy

couple"
Me: Hello?
Andy: Hey, I got a bit of a problem..
Me: Ok...
Andy: No, really. 100% serious, I need you to be completely honest with me.
Me: Allright... what's up?
Andy: No, I'm not kidding... this is serious and I need to know the truth.
Me: OK OK, I get it what the hell do you want?
.....
Andy: <sighs>
Me: GODDAMIT WHAT?!
....
Andy: Can you break your dick?
<silence, then muffled laughter, then me ROARING>
Me: HAHA!? WHAT?! WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED? WHAT DID YOU DO?
Andy: Well... Lindsay (succubus, also best friends younger sister) got a little back door action tonight
Me: BWAHAHAHAHA!!!! HOLY SHIT! NO FUCKING WAY YOU STUCK IT IN LINDSAYS ASS?!?!
Andy: HA, yeah.... <sounds worried> But I think I broke my dick...
Me: <uncontrollable laugther>
Andy: FUCK YOU ITS NOT FUNNY! IT HURTS, I CAN'T EVEN TOUCH IT
Me: <more uncontrollable laughter>
Me: Ok... <snicker> What happened?
Andy: Well, she actually liked it...
Me: Ok?
Andy: Well, I was jamming her in her ass, and she started jamming back
Me: And...?
Andy: Well it slipped out and she jammed it really hard and it made this pop noise and I swear to god I think its broken
Me: <uncontrollable laughter>
Andy: FUCK YOU!!! I'M SERIOUS!
Me: This is too good, we gotta get Josh in on this, hang on...
Andy: No, wait, I don't want anyone to know about...
*click, beeeep*
Josh: Hello?
Me: DUUUUUUUDE! GUESS WHAT!!??!?!
Josh: Dammit, its 2:30 in the morning, what the hell do you want!?
Me: ANDY STUCK IT IN LINDSAYS ASS!
Josh: Hahaha, WHAT!?
Me: Yeah, hang on I got Andy on 3 way
*click, beeeeeep*
Andy: Hello?
Josh: YOU STUCK IT IN HER BUTT?!
Me: <uncontrollable laughter>
Andy: Goddammit Mike, you're an asshole!
Me: An asshole, huh? You keep your dick away from me, or I'll break it OFF!
Josh: DUDE YOU REALLY DID IT! HA! I'VE BEEN TELLING YOU TO DO THAT FOR HOW LONG NOW?!
<noise in the background. Jenny, Josh's not hot (so dont ask for pics) fiancee wakes up, wants to know what the hell is going on. She grabs the phone>
Jenny: JOHNSON! ANDY! WHAT THE FUCK WE WERE SLEEPING!? THIS BETTER BE IMPORTANT!?!
Andy: HAHAHAHAHAAaaaa
Me: ANDY STUCK IT IN LINDSAYS ASS!
Jenny: Holy shit dude, high five!
So this went on for a good hour, it was amazing. So amazing I was so involved in the conversation I missed my exit, and ended up in northern Minnesota. Minnesota, even any part of it, is not on the way from Detroit to Denver. I've got some mishaps/adventures from the trip, but I'm saving them to keep me from getting banned at a later date.
Fast forward to sunday night, after the bolt breaks off on my crank shaft and an easy out has broken off in this hardened bolt. Andy is there, and Mr. V (best friends father, also Lindsay's father) is there as well, assessing the situation.
Mr. V: Wow... I can't believe you broke that big bolt off, its huge!
Andy: Yeah, Mikes a dumbass...
Me: OH REALLY?! I'm a dumbass, huh?
Andy: Yeah, what?
Mr. V: That easy out is hardened, I can't believe it broke off in there
Me: Well, the pulley has to be pressed onto the crank, its an interference fit. I had to use the longer bolt to get it seated, I didn't expect it to break.
Mr. V: <picks up the balancer, and tries to slide it on the crank> Wow, thats a tight fit, I think that hole is too small. Either way I can't get over that bolt breaking off in there.
Andy: Yep, he's a dumbass.
Me: Hmm... You know Mr. V, Andy's pretty good at breaking hardened tools in tight holes too!
Andy turns white as a ghost, yet can't say a word.
Mr. V: What?
Me: Yeah, he was working with his crankshaft and broke it or something in a hole that was too tight!
Andy, still speechless, looks like he's going to cry
Mr. V: Really? When was this?
Me: Oh, it was awhile ago, as it turns out it really wasn't broken like he thought and the problem sorta worked it self out in about 2 weeks. He couldn't use it for that time though!
Mr. V: Oh, was this when you needed to borrow one of our cars, Andy?
Me: <snicker>
Andy: Yes, sir <gives me the look of death>
Mr. V: Oh, well.... you guys really gotta be more careful with this stuff, you can't be so rough with it!