Parenting advice needed
- Thread starter fyoung7
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AutoRoc
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Also...
The whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing was explained to me kind of like this...
You aren't REALLY dating anyone when you live with your parents.. You are a nobody brat who is about as capable as dog shit. Go find a job, support yourself, and at that point.. Go find someone to live with, date, etc. They never said that to me but somehow I figured that out. Probably after saying something in 3rd grade about people "dating" in my class.. Haha
At no point, living under my parents roof, did I ever claim that I had a "girlfriend". They never heard me say, "hey this is my girlfriend, ¢7@#$!&" until I had my own place.
The whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing was explained to me kind of like this...
You aren't REALLY dating anyone when you live with your parents.. You are a nobody brat who is about as capable as dog shit. Go find a job, support yourself, and at that point.. Go find someone to live with, date, etc. They never said that to me but somehow I figured that out. Probably after saying something in 3rd grade about people "dating" in my class.. Haha
At no point, living under my parents roof, did I ever claim that I had a "girlfriend". They never heard me say, "hey this is my girlfriend, ¢7@#$!&" until I had my own place.
mustangmike6996
Club Member
I see things the same as most of you on here. I think you need to make him prove himself as useful and self sufficient. He needs to be able to obtain a job and start working towards a career... certifications or a college degree-something along those lines.
Why is your daughter still with this guy anyway (not trying to change topic) but it sounds like you might be aiding in this by helping you daughter out. She might not understand the concept of life or living on her own if she thinks its ok for her BF to freeload at your place. Example, I knew a girl who was about that age and did the stay with the parents/ go to school and they paid for most of her stuff.... She had insurance paid and unlimited gas for the car (Lumina) that was a hand-me-down.... she knew that money was tight with her family but didnt understand how to spend it wisely or save for important things because she had no financial responsibilities.
As for being over 20 and living at home, there are a few reasons I personally find it ok. Fresh out of college or still attending. Hard pressed for work or a family matter keeping you there. BUT, you better make yourself worthwhile.... For example, I lived with my grandparents until I joined the USMC at 24. I couldve moved out on my own a few years prior but my grandpa had some medical complications so I stayed to help because I knew I would be over there everyday anyway and it was a 24/7 type of care that was needed. My bro was a dirtbag until I left and told him he needs to straiten his shit and help while Im gone-things are now 180 degrees different with him since responsibility was dumped on him.
You need to slowly ween your daughter off of the cashflow and housing. make her see what an ass her BF is. Im not saying that you need to play matchmaker but open her eyes to a new light and hopefully she will influence some change in him.
Why is your daughter still with this guy anyway (not trying to change topic) but it sounds like you might be aiding in this by helping you daughter out. She might not understand the concept of life or living on her own if she thinks its ok for her BF to freeload at your place. Example, I knew a girl who was about that age and did the stay with the parents/ go to school and they paid for most of her stuff.... She had insurance paid and unlimited gas for the car (Lumina) that was a hand-me-down.... she knew that money was tight with her family but didnt understand how to spend it wisely or save for important things because she had no financial responsibilities.
As for being over 20 and living at home, there are a few reasons I personally find it ok. Fresh out of college or still attending. Hard pressed for work or a family matter keeping you there. BUT, you better make yourself worthwhile.... For example, I lived with my grandparents until I joined the USMC at 24. I couldve moved out on my own a few years prior but my grandpa had some medical complications so I stayed to help because I knew I would be over there everyday anyway and it was a 24/7 type of care that was needed. My bro was a dirtbag until I left and told him he needs to straiten his shit and help while Im gone-things are now 180 degrees different with him since responsibility was dumped on him.
You need to slowly ween your daughter off of the cashflow and housing. make her see what an ass her BF is. Im not saying that you need to play matchmaker but open her eyes to a new light and hopefully she will influence some change in him.