Koala bear for sale

moneypit

moneypit

Club Member
have a three year old Koala Bear named GumNut, that I'm desperately trying to find a new home for. I bought him back in January figuring it would be an awesome pet that would enjoy living in my greenhouse, sadly I was wrong. I paid $3200 for him back in January and I'am not sure what the used Koala Bear market is like in a good economy or the one we have now; so I'am open to offers. Please use some common sense before contacting me, don't be an idiot, I'am not interested in trading my Koala Bear for your busted up 1980's Camero, your XBOX, or an offer to paint my garage door.

GumNut's Stats:

The Good

*He is somewhat housebroken, uses a cat box most of the time.
*For the most part he is very quite; this also falls into the bad category which we will touch on in a moment.
*He eats spiders, (not kidding) we haven't had a spider in our house since we got him.
*Hates watching Desperate Housewives, used to be my wifes favorite show until GumNut bit her for changing the channel from Jeopardy, to Desperate Housewives.
*Gets along well with one of my two dogs.
*Loves to go for car rides.



Now for the Bad:

*He eats a lot of eucalyptus, which is not as cheap as I expected.
*Apparently eucalyptus is like a drug for Koala Bears, when GumNut is coming down from his high he becomes very violent and aggressive.
*He raped and killed my wife's cat "Miss. Kitty'" (Honestly, I wanted to put this in the good section because I've been trying to find a way to get that worthless cat out of our house for two years, thanks GumNut.)
*He does not like Asian's, I have no idea where this Koala was raised but someone of Asian Decent must have really mistreated him.
*Loves Vin Diesel movies, not sure why, he just does.
*Has extremely sharp claws and teeth which he uses often.
*Loves shiny objects, steals and hides them frequently in my dog's **s.
*He is quite, and as a result has snuck in on my wife and I during intimate moments. I mind him watching; maybe it won't bother you as much.
* GumNut smells terrible and is not easy to wash. I had to hold a gas soaked rag over his mouth till he blacked out to get him in this tub for a bath.
*Once he is in the water he is fine, getting him into the water is a challenge, he will scratch you, he will bite you, and you will bleed.

this is a craigslist add sent to me
 
Funny thing is with all the stuff Ken has I really wouldn't be surprised if he had a koala bear too.
 
trade gumnuts+ cash for my african gazelle named lester? lester is a great pet its just that my yard is too small and he needs room to run. lester is well behaved and doesnt eat much. he does have an an anxiety disorder and flips out when he sees house cats but a blindfold will cam him down
 
i never laughed so hard in my life.
thanks i needed that
:lol:


i almost bought it and then i thought this cant be for real....
 
dammit, I have 6 cats, 4 chinchillas and a big ass turtle (who doesn't like his nose petted BTW) I seriously was considering it for a minute :laugh:
Not to mention the squirrels that stand up and lean up on my front screen door waiting for peanuts :roll:
Couple cardinals hang out at the bird feeder too. I have been tempted to get the damn groundhog outta the back yard though, (anyone has a 22 long, a firehose or some C4 I can borrow :) and with all the geese and ducks out back I figure why pay for Christmas dinner :) I have a 10 pump LOL I just don't think my wife would clean one of them :dontknow:
At least it's better than the skunks and possums out in Chesterfield. My damn GIANT Orange tabby half(?) feral city cat obviously thought skunks were other cats and fucked with them... alot (ugh)
 
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